Too #BadAss to be a conventional blogger - Interview

Too #BadAss to be a conventional blogger, featured in the list of top Indian bloggers fighting body shaming. A year back, I was told 'your blog is interesting, but different', which meant you won't survive. I fought fiercely to prove them wrong and this listing is a proof that women are redefining beauty for themselves, thank you for so much positivity.

I am proud to represent women who are unapologetic about their definition of self love, strong women empower each other.

Interview Link: Featured in the list of top Indian bloggers talking about body positivity.

30ish & No Kids Yet - An Uncomfortable Tag

This post was long overdue on 30ish, may be uncomfortable but important to be discussed. I write this blog completely unbiased with highest regard towards all women (single/married/mothers). We are endlessly discussed and spoken for, its time we speak for ourselves.

Women are gradually taking up new roles, being a mother is her ultimate calling no doubt but if she needs time then there shouldn't be a need to justify. Women in their 30's are being separated into two groups- mothers & childfree and surprisingly they are struggling to find a common ground. Some women are ready at 22 and some ain't ready until 32, too personal to be debated. 

Life Hack: Child, planning a child, no child - All these decisions belong to the couple and no one else.

All my work revolves around kids, I love them but every individual has a personal threshold for sharing their life and nurturing a child. Being a mother is a tough journey, I respect your struggle then why don't you respect my hustle?Every time you ask her ‘so when are you planning’ even before checking on ‘how is she doing’ it puts her on the back foot. 

Uncomfortable assumptions people make:

They mustn’t be getting along

She is too career minded

Something is surely wrong

They want to live like college students forever

The age old 'So whats the good news', could mean news things like you starting a new business, planning an adventure trip around  South America, helping our society live better. We belong to a very interesting millennium lets live and love more without putting each other down.

I respect all women who are unapologetic about their decisions, 30ish fights stereotypes and proudly promotes sisterhood, write to us if you would like to discuss anything on this forum.
  

11:00 PM Contractions Have Started - Birth Photography by #PhotoblogHER

Born : 4:33AM, In Labour: 5.30 hours, Birth: Natural - Captured by #PhotoblogHER

'Birth Photography' is the most stunning and misunderstood art/stream of photography. It is very subjective and not everyone would be fine with it, which is perfectly acceptable. If this is the first time you herd about this, please have an open mind. Birth is raw and empowering, there are very few couples in India who are as bold to let someone capture their most vulnerable moment. This experience reassured me that #PhotoblogHER is on the right path, I celebrate women through photography.

Life Hack: I couldn't hold my tears but that would ruin his' first photograph.

I am not writing this to offend anyone but sharing the power I saw which was the most glorious I ever experienced. There is so much trust in the room, the mother trusting her body, baby trusting the mother, the couple trusting each other.

You are one call away, there is no shoot set up, no extra lighting just an ocean of emotions, noise, anxiety, pain, joy, in the delivery room. 

Note: Couples document birth for themselves, we capture every aspect of our lives except birth because it seems intrusive but the truth is that there is nothing more magical than creating life. 

  

Jailed For Love - Life After Prison, A True Story

I have been attempting to write this story since 2 months, tried various options to get to the jail authorities and lawyers but nobody wants to talk about it. Any conversation regarding the rights of the prisoners sparks a debate, ‘why should we worry about them?' agreed, but what about the ones who are being punished due to a delay in judgement and spend years being an under trial. Our society does not forgive them even after they have served their term for being guilty. In most cases even their own families avoid contact and support. 

Life Hack: There is a strong nexus of unspoken politics, crime, and bribe that exists within these jails you have to really ‘up’ your survival game. 

This is the story of Nagma (name changed), she was married at the age of 22 in UP. “Amitabh Bachchan was also born in Allahabad, but his kismet made him a super star and mine made me a criminal”.  I asked her the reason and she replied in a very poetic yet tragic tone “Pyaar Ke Liye”, I wanted a good life with my husband, he introduced me to an easy way of making money, initially I smuggled small packets of drugs unaware but by the time I realised the mess, it was too late. As time progressed he got very abusive and difficult, I was balancing guilt, a new born child and a drunk husband at the same time. 

Then something I feared for months finally happened, I was caught in a big raid which turned my life upside down. If you are seized, you are left on your own nobody comes forward, even my husband left me with the fear of getting caught himself. 

Nagma spent almost 5 years in the prison, out of which 2 years were under trial. Her daughter was with her throughout as she was completely dependant on her. According to the Indian jurisdiction, the child can accompany the mother in the jail till the age of 6years. “ I do not know if it was good or bad” my daughter was raised behind the bars, for no fault of hers. She was fed and looked after better than my relatives would but she thinks, jail is her real home because no one talks to us when we are free. 

Nagma’s story is a reflection of what most of these women go through once they are released from the prison. I really believe in letting people recover emotionally, just because you did something bad, doesn't mean you are a bad person. We need to give them opportunities to reintegrate with the society. Nagma is going to help me (PhotoblogHER) with body positive workshops in schools, she wants to be a part of the society in a constructive way in the hope that this might give her daughter a normal childhood. 

We judge people too soon, every struggle always has a reason, she committed the crime for the love of her life and now she wants to be a better person for the love of her child. If they are willing to make a positive change give them a chance because no one is perfect. 
*****
Nagma's story was covered by C4N News and Speaking Tree, within 24 hours I received emails from readers across India who genuinely wanted to help them. One of them has offered to help her daughter with education and child development. Every step in the right direction deserves an applause.

C4N News Link: http://bit.ly/1TXB2K2
  

Fighting Body Shaming With PhotoblogHER

#PhotoblogHER, it is my attempt to talk about 'positive body image'. I combine art and activism to strike a conversation about body positivity. Take everything that is bright within you and introduce it someone. As privileged strong women we should take ownership and inspire the next generation to live fearlessly. Women are very focused when they are vulnerable because they anticipate fear, using this as the base I work on projects that actively manifest female embodiment and strength. 

PhotoblogHER disrupts the status quo, speaks the truth, ruffles stereotypes and encourages change. A woman should never have to apologise for her glory.

Life Hack: When a woman stands up for herself, she represents the entire race. 

Recently The Better India featured stories and photographs by PhotoblogHER, in a world where bloggers promote 'perfection' to take a stand against it and celebrate vulnerabilities is a tough call, but I am committed. 

  

Celles De La Terra features 30ish and PhotoblogHER - Beauty is fearless

"My purpose is bigger than me"

Thank you for embracing the power of young Indian women, Celles De La Terre a Paris based international women's group featured stories of exceptional women across the globe, my fight as a body positive activist has a global voice. 

Interview Link(French and English)

The reason why they feel ashamed, is probably because when they were a child they went through a lot of discrimination or kind of feeling of being judged. They felt this at the early age. If they want to fight against body shaming they have to tackle the true causes

  

Eves'dropping - The joy of making audacious plans

Women benefit from many changes in their life, work and beyond. We share our vulnerabilities and experiences to form support groups for each other. This is extremely personal, each one is an important member of the circle. Listen and inspire each other through experience and love.  Confidence gives us what we want, builds us, protects us, hold it tight like your life depends on it, because it does.

Life Hack: Eves'dropping is going to listen to you with a woman's sensibilities 

 Visit: poojakochar.in

 What is Eves'dropping?

Eves'dropping is an initiative that connects and empowers women entrepreneurs, it took a community to get here. Every start-up has its own struggles and path, but there is lots we can learn from each other. We unite women on their core strength of character and desire to disrupt boundaries. I am creating a space which allows you to experiment and grow your network through strong conversations and interesting workshops.

Our first workshop was hosted this March'2016, 

Eves'dropping is on a multi city tour, we are visiting Hyderabad on 29th April. I am in awe of women who look beyond themselves because my purpose is bigger than me. You can drop an email  at 30ish.blogging@gmail.com to be a part of our May workshop in Mumbai.