30ish & No Kids Yet - An Uncomfortable Tag

This post was long overdue on 30ish, may be uncomfortable but important to be discussed. I write this blog completely unbiased with highest regard towards all women (single/married/mothers). We are endlessly discussed and spoken for, its time we speak for ourselves.

Women are gradually taking up new roles, being a mother is her ultimate calling no doubt but if she needs time then there shouldn't be a need to justify. Women in their 30's are being separated into two groups- mothers & childfree and surprisingly they are struggling to find a common ground. Some women are ready at 22 and some ain't ready until 32, too personal to be debated. 

Life Hack: Child, planning a child, no child - All these decisions belong to the couple and no one else.

All my work revolves around kids, I love them but every individual has a personal threshold for sharing their life and nurturing a child. Being a mother is a tough journey, I respect your struggle then why don't you respect my hustle?Every time you ask her ‘so when are you planning’ even before checking on ‘how is she doing’ it puts her on the back foot. 

Uncomfortable assumptions people make:

They mustn’t be getting along

She is too career minded

Something is surely wrong

They want to live like college students forever

The age old 'So whats the good news', could mean news things like you starting a new business, planning an adventure trip around  South America, helping our society live better. We belong to a very interesting millennium lets live and love more without putting each other down.

I respect all women who are unapologetic about their decisions, 30ish fights stereotypes and proudly promotes sisterhood, write to us if you would like to discuss anything on this forum.
  

11:00 PM Contractions Have Started - Birth Photography by #PhotoblogHER

Born : 4:33AM, In Labour: 5.30 hours, Birth: Natural - Captured by #PhotoblogHER

'Birth Photography' is the most stunning and misunderstood art/stream of photography. It is very subjective and not everyone would be fine with it, which is perfectly acceptable. If this is the first time you herd about this, please have an open mind. Birth is raw and empowering, there are very few couples in India who are as bold to let someone capture their most vulnerable moment. This experience reassured me that #PhotoblogHER is on the right path, I celebrate women through photography.

Life Hack: I couldn't hold my tears but that would ruin his' first photograph.

I am not writing this to offend anyone but sharing the power I saw which was the most glorious I ever experienced. There is so much trust in the room, the mother trusting her body, baby trusting the mother, the couple trusting each other.

You are one call away, there is no shoot set up, no extra lighting just an ocean of emotions, noise, anxiety, pain, joy, in the delivery room. 

Note: Couples document birth for themselves, we capture every aspect of our lives except birth because it seems intrusive but the truth is that there is nothing more magical than creating life. 

  

Fighting Body Shaming With PhotoblogHER

#PhotoblogHER, it is my attempt to talk about 'positive body image'. I combine art and activism to strike a conversation about body positivity. Take everything that is bright within you and introduce it someone. As privileged strong women we should take ownership and inspire the next generation to live fearlessly. Women are very focused when they are vulnerable because they anticipate fear, using this as the base I work on projects that actively manifest female embodiment and strength. 

PhotoblogHER disrupts the status quo, speaks the truth, ruffles stereotypes and encourages change. A woman should never have to apologise for her glory.

Life Hack: When a woman stands up for herself, she represents the entire race. 

Recently The Better India featured stories and photographs by PhotoblogHER, in a world where bloggers promote 'perfection' to take a stand against it and celebrate vulnerabilities is a tough call, but I am committed. 

  

Celles De La Terra features 30ish and PhotoblogHER - Beauty is fearless

"My purpose is bigger than me"

Thank you for embracing the power of young Indian women, Celles De La Terre a Paris based international women's group featured stories of exceptional women across the globe, my fight as a body positive activist has a global voice. 

Interview Link(French and English)

The reason why they feel ashamed, is probably because when they were a child they went through a lot of discrimination or kind of feeling of being judged. They felt this at the early age. If they want to fight against body shaming they have to tackle the true causes

  

Eves'dropping - The joy of making audacious plans

Women benefit from many changes in their life, work and beyond. We share our vulnerabilities and experiences to form support groups for each other. This is extremely personal, each one is an important member of the circle. Listen and inspire each other through experience and love.  Confidence gives us what we want, builds us, protects us, hold it tight like your life depends on it, because it does.

Life Hack: Eves'dropping is going to listen to you with a woman's sensibilities 

 Visit: poojakochar.in

 What is Eves'dropping?

Eves'dropping is an initiative that connects and empowers women entrepreneurs, it took a community to get here. Every start-up has its own struggles and path, but there is lots we can learn from each other. We unite women on their core strength of character and desire to disrupt boundaries. I am creating a space which allows you to experiment and grow your network through strong conversations and interesting workshops.

Our first workshop was hosted this March'2016, 

Eves'dropping is on a multi city tour, we are visiting Hyderabad on 29th April. I am in awe of women who look beyond themselves because my purpose is bigger than me. You can drop an email  at 30ish.blogging@gmail.com to be a part of our May workshop in Mumbai.

  

CrossFit, Raise The Bar.

Lift like a girl, translates as 'lift like a beast'. First rule of CrossFit is to never have a routine, every WOD (workout of the day) is a blend of strength, endurance and agility training. The first time I stepped into the box (gym) it was sweaty, intense and loud, you will be intimated by how complicated it seems to an outsider. Everybody who joins CrossFit seems to be obsessed with it, I tried it a couple of years back but my body wasn't ready for such a strict regime, so this time when I decided to give it try I was much more prepared to enjoy the soreness. 

Life Hack: Raise the bar for yourself, raise the bar for a stronger you. Hard is not bad, hard is just hard and requires more discipline.

Personally I have never put myself through anything so physically challenging, it is my attempt to increase my threshold for pain.You are, what you repeatedly do when things get hard.

CrossFit is extremely rigorous, it takes time for your body to adjust to the new regime but if you are persistent it will start getting you stubborn about your workout goals. Hard work and the way your body looks is directly proportionate to each other, as women we need to give more importance to mobility, strength and intelligence. 

Beauty is measured in joy and pride, every time I walk out with all that sweat and soreness, I feel beautiful.  I am recognising and accepting my body's gifts and shortcomings, I understand my body much better now.

"I can do that, may be not that fast, may be not that heavy but I can do it.. and I will”.

I train with RudeBox Fitness @BeatNBounce, incase you are interested.

  

Thanks for the troll, I was famous by default

I recently blogged about a story related to child abuse in Mumbai brothels, it is a sincere a story and brings out some harsh realities of our society. I personally went through lot of internal conflict before putting it on the blog, considering it was risky but if my stories don’t make you think what is the point of this tremendous reach. Last week the same story was featured on one of India’s popular youth networks, it was all fine till I started getting personally attacked on my social media channels for being politically involved, being a feminist, having a religious preference, they even disapproved my hairstyle :/

The story has an important lesson which should be shared, hiding from reality does not make it disappear. Sad, how some people refuse to see the bigger picture and continue thinking mediocre. 

Life Hack: Trolling by definition, is someone who creates conflict by posting messages that are controversial and personal, they usually attack in groups to upset your sanity.

It was iconic because Anushka Sharma (Virat Kohli), Honey Singh (Bipolar and Alcoholism) and Pooja Kochar (no reason) were trolled on the same day. It is amazing how people miss the point and take off on their own tangent. As an individual I refuse to respond to trolls, but as a brand 30ish stands for authentic story telling, my fight is to keep blogging real and, "this makes your social trolling irrelevant to me". I refuse to feed the troll, and encourage negativity.

  

Shakti - Dear Women, I apologise

As a woman, “I apologise for calling you beautiful before brave” the images actively manifest female embodiment and strength.You are beautiful not like the magazines, but because of the way you think, the way focus, the way you love and stand strong. Shakti is a visual narrative showcasing women being strong in their daily lives.

Life Hack: True Shakti is disruptive.

I have been working since 6 months on project ‘Shakti’, collecting stories of women that epitomise strength in their daily lives. Every photograph holds a story of her background and struggle. It has been very overwhelming for me as a photographer, every time a woman shared  her vulnerability and fears, Shakti grew stronger. I will be continuing to work on this series, and capture stories of women across the globe because some emotions are universal and beyond barriers. There’s no rational reason for me to explore such stories, but I feel very connected with women who need a voice. 

This story has been featured by #Homegrown as a tribute to women on International Women's Day

True Shakti is disruptive

  

Strong, like a girl - A blogger's vision

Here’s a simple dream, a crisp white shirt, bag full of books and endless possibilities. I write this article as a woman, who was once a girl.

Don’t be afraid of your body changing, this is going to make you more beautiful.

Don’t fear uncomfortable attention, you are capable enough to deal with it.

Don’t let anyone make choices on your behalf, you are brilliant.

You are a diamond, a rose, god’s best creation.

You are loved.

 Life Hack: Girls don’t decide to hate their bodies, we teach them to.

A girl’s self esteem peaks at 9 and drops at 12, if she is empowered it jumps at 20 again. As a social experiment I started approaching schools to talk about my vision of promoting ‘Positive Body Image’. Our young generation faces lot of complex self-esteem issues, many of which become apparent during early teens. Involving them in the format of workshops, allows them to experience the power of thinking beyond conventional norms without being too moralistic.

Here’s an interesting incidence, as part of my social initiative I met these absolutely stunning & fiercely intelligent young girls and asked them to select a word that defined them. They picked words like strong, fire, power, smile, beautiful. The most striking quality was that they were completely unafraid and beyond inhibitions. She is not going to turn 25, and suddenly bloom into a confident young woman. We have to assure them at every stage that she is unique, because every girl’s self worth matters.

The only way to develop a healthy attitude towards imperfections is to talk to girls when they are in the most vulnerable age. We teach them a very important lesson, “when you appreciate someone else it doesn’t make you less beautiful”. Women by nature like to deal with difficulty by empathising and supporting each other, thus empower them as groups.

We make decisions our entire life based on these precious years of growth. A self assured child is the most powerful source of inspiration. Let them be ambitious, creative and independent. “You are beautiful not like the magazines, but because of the way you think, the way you love, the way focus, the way you stand strong, the way you bet on yourself”.

Take everything that is bright within you and introduce it someone. As privileged strong women we should take ownership and inspire the next generation to live fearlessly. When girls hold back due to beauty related anxiety, our society misses out.

 

As blogger’s we have to make sure to not dilute our true perspective for sponsored posts. Blogs can be a catalyst to positive change in our society, it’s a tough journey but I am committed. I dedicate this article to our change makers, our dreamers, our visionaries. It’s my passion and mission to make every girl child have the same opportunity, as I did. 

 Who said, "Strong like a Girl" has to be preachy, we have a gangster vibe.

Thank You for supporting our vision.